We'd like to salute a promising young lad from Hastings, MI who has great future ahead of him. He stole a neighbor's car and and went on a rampage. Not bad for only being eight years old. We wish him a speedy recovery and encourage his parents to continue to ignore any parenting advice they might be given after this incident. Hopefully with direction (or lack there of) he can graduate beyond driving at a "mediocre" speed, and move on to driving like a bat out of...well, you know.
Brackish
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Don't confuse Hastings with Hope Township (like Wood TV did). Kids from Hastings don't run over their own bikes. Key indicators to watch out for in this news story are "Dowling" and "Gurd Rd." which are almost as bad as "Orangeville". Don't ever go to Orangeville - where children drive stolen Durangos to pick up shotgun shells and cans of Busch light in blaze orange cans.
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