Dante's Cineplex

Well, it's Friday and we at AD can't wait for the end of the day. Because tonight is movie night! Now our tastes in movies might seem by some to be questionable and by others to be quite dreadful. This is because we absolutely adore movies that degrade the art form, that lower the bar, and were made solely for profit.

No this does NOT refer to horror movies. Many people think we love attending such features, but it is not the case. Once in a while a good one comes along (everyone dies and there is much cleavage), but in most horror films the villain loses in the end! Just like in "The Exorcist", hilarious movie, but such a dreadful ending. At their best horror movies teach humans to face their fears, and make them think about Good, Evil, Death and the Afterlife. All that thinking is BAD. So we shy away from those films.

The movies we prefer avoid such deep questions and, in fact, give humans unrealistic expectations about the lives they lead. Such it is with that epitome of modern cinema, the romantic comedy! In the romantic comedy every immoral action is excusable as long as it is done in the name of "True Love". Husbands can leave wives, property can be damaged, and laws can be broken just so we can end the movie with that passionate kiss.

Writers know the power of that ending and will allow themselves to get sloppy with every other area of the script. Sappy dialogue abounds, potholes gape and audiences eat it up. The end result is people start thinking about the "perfect" relationship. They start comparing themselves to the shadows that appear on the screen. "Why isn't my husband that romantic?", they ask, "Why isn't my wife that sexy?"

The truth is since no one on Earth is perfect, neither is any relationship. There is no such thing as finding THE ONE. If that were true then widows wouldn't ever be able to remarry, they would just die like forlorn love birds. The best part is with people having such high standards, even when they are in a truly great and stable relationship and they start to have trouble, they begin to doubt that they married the right person. "Why am I wasting my time in this relationship", they ask, "when THE ONE I'm supposed to be with might still be out there?" Our files are filled with broken lives and relationships caused by such "chasing after the horizon". What's really happening is the blame for the cooling off is being laid squarely on the spouse or loved one, and the one casting blame is ignoring his/her role in how things are. Simply beautiful. What could be better art than that?

Well, I must hurry. I have to make sure my work is done for the day so I'm not late tonight. There is a Sandra Bullock movie marathon at the Ritz.

Brackish